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Skinbag has been messing with the “wrong” pussy way too many times this week. THIS pussy’s been fighting for bed space all week, and it’s just getting old! A flying leap upon the bed with stuffed mouse seemed to cause only minor interruption to Thursday’s games, and then he decided that I would be totally ignored at lunchtime too!
I foresee several lizard’s in shoes and not just his…
Seems that the Skinbag can get these weird looking things to sit in front of his eyes from halfway across the world before I can get his present for this yearly “familial” gathering…
There’s a claw for somebody in this story somewhere…
*whack*
NO! This is not, cannot be…
The Contract is out now
I’m thinking the Author’s likely to find a couple of paws stuck down his throat as he wakes up suffocating in the night…
Skinbag and I were taking one of our regular constitutional patrols about the boundaries when he looks down at me oddly albeit with the merest hint of a smirk.
“How would you like a little friend to keep you company at home these days?”
Now I can tell immediately by the slight uncertainty behind those slowly tightening green pissholes in the snow he’d like to think of as eyes, that I’ve already got this argument won. All I have to do is confirm his place at the bottom of the food chain. He’s tried it before, he want’s to get one of those damn little fuzzballs in to be my successor. Little bastard will just wait until I’m sleeping one day then accidentally roll me off the roof. Then of course the little shit will try and look all distraught when the Skinbag gets home after work. I’ve seen how these things work before.
I stopped strolling, looked the Skinbag squarely in those beady green “Hors d’œuvre” and then just reached up and stuck both sets of front claws into his leg lightly, flexing just enough for him to get the message, then wandered off. I suspect he’s got the message again for a while. I guess that should hold him off six months or so. Humans!
I’d been trying the sympathy vote on Skinbag for a few days. Hasn’t seemed to have worked. All I scored was ONE (only fucking ONE) egg nog, the same shit food, and a threat to be put down if I cost $300 or greater!! The Fucker’s gonna pay when he least expects! Grrr….
Damned Skinbag moved my dining area for fuck knows what reason! I’ve lost my view of the back garden while dining. Now all I get is wood paneling 200mm from my nose…
There will be pain to follow this redecorating on his part! Or, perhaps I’ll turn those new stools of his to sawdust… 🙂
A cat goes out to do what a cat has to do and it’s so bloody windy I got my arse nearly blown up around my nose… undignified!
Skinbag’s definitely up to something today, and it’s smells distinctly like Seafood! Where the fuck is all my Shit going?
My whiskers are bristling with suspicion!
Well finally Skinbag’s better mood for the last day or so has an explanation! Seems there’ll be some cash rolling in again and the crap that he’s been feeding me will once more improve! Also he won’t be under my paws all bloody day from next week and a cat can have a bit of peace and quiet again. From what I gather he’ll be home in the evenings again, and that means I won’t have to miss out on my daily beating up on him when he gets home.